Inside Outside Upside Down
by LamKyion
Summary: Sasuke needs an attitude adjustment. Gaara is overprotective. Haku has gender issues. Ino and Sai are two peas in a pod. Lee is full of youth. Kiba is done just being friends. Sakura is a tad skitzo. And Poor Naruto is stuck watching it unfold.
1. Rainy Sundays Make Me Vomit

Disclaimer:

**Disclaimer**:

I own nothing.

**Summery:**

Sasuke needs an attitude adjustment. Gaara is overprotective. So is Zabuza. Haku has gender issues. Sai and Ino are two peas in a pod. Lee is full of youth. Kiba is sick of just being friends. Sakura is a tad skitzo. And Poor Naruto is stuck watching it all unfold.

**Warnings! :**

Boy Love. Cross-dressing. Swearing. Adult situations. Self harm.

And general life expected asshat-ry.

**Inside Outside Upside Down**

_Chapter 1: Rainy Sundays Make Me Vomit_

Uzamaki Naruto wasn't very fond of rain.

In his humble opinion the rain made everything about life seem twice as bleak.

Didn't matter what it was.

Take the paper cut he had just gotten for example.

It's a decent sized paper cut, on his left hand, just below the knuckle. If it had been nice out Naruto probably wouldn't have been bothered by it but with the presence of rain it was irritating and painful and caused him to wallow in pain for 15 minutes only after dramatically bandaging it and swearing to himself.

At current Naruto was very bored, very lonely and very very hungry.

All of these things being sad in the first place is only that more depressing with the presence of rain.

And if you add those up with the fact that today was a Sunday it HAD to be one of the worst days ever. Because rainy Sundays HAD to be the worst, the absolutely positively WORST thing ever.

At least that's what Naruto told himself.

Said boy sat alone in the corner of his run down apartment. TV blaring an infomercial as he blinked warily out the window into the dark gray skies.

A sigh.

His stomach growled and he glared down at his abdomen in frustration

"I know. I'm hungry stop reminding me…."

He stomach yelled again and he moaned smacking his head onto the cold surface of the small wooden table in front of him

"I hhhhhhhhhhate rainy days" he whined in a very childlike manner, propping hic chin up on the table. "This is the WORST day ever…I swear…the Sunday before having to go back to school…back to that pit!! Not only am I out of food but its fucking raining!! How much worse can you get?!"

As if on cue there was a crack of thunder in the distance and his lights flickered for a second and then died leaving the poor blonde child to stare helplessly into the dark.

The power was out.

Someone up there must hate him.

Truly and utter hate him with the entirety of their supernatural being.

He hated the rain. He hated the dark. He was hungry and alone and now there wasn't even infomercials to provide what little entertainment they did.

This day sucked.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door.

"_Fuck_" Naruto muttered as loud bangs continued.

"What now…I swear if it's one of those religious groups again telling me I'm a heaven I'm just gonna go ahead and kill myself," he muttered darkly under his breath as he stood.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm coming," he yelled out trying to make his way to the door in the pitch black.

Naruto tripped smacking his forehead right smack into the door and was thankfully able to catch the handle before he slid and got a face full of floor. Swearing under his breath he yanked the door open, to find his landlord standing with a flashlight and a concerned look.

"I-Iruka nii-chan!" Naruto exclaimed standing up right.

The elder man smiled and replied with a quiet hello.

"What are you doing here eh?"

"Mmm the power went off so I came to check on you…" Iruka muttered a tad embarrassed. "Also I was wondering if you'd like to join me for a bit to eat…I know eating alone can be lonely, even more so on a rainy day so I thought you'd might like to join me…my treat?" He asked giving Naruto a smile.

"I'D LOVE TO!!" Naruto breathed,

"Oh good." Iruka sighed. "Well then get your coat, I hope Ramen is ok with you?"

A grin broke across Naruto's face for the fist time all day as he ran to grab his coat not even stopping once to swear as he tripped over the table, his ps2 and other miscellaneous items.

Rainy Sundays were looking up.

To be continued…

_**Yeah yeah I know…this chapter BLEW.**_

_**But its just the first chapter…please read on…I swear it will get better.**_

_**I SWEAR OO**_


	2. First impressions of The Ice Prince

Disclaimer:

**Disclaimer**:

I STILL own nothing.

**Summery:**

Sasuke needs an attitude adjustment. Gaara is overprotective. So is Zabuza. Haku has gender issues. Ino and Sai are two peas in a pod. Lee is full of youth. Kiba is sick of just being friends. Sakura is a tad skitzo. And Poor Naruto is stuck watching it all unfold.

**Warnings:**

Boy Love. Cross-dressing. Swearing. Adult situations. Self harm.

And general life expected asshat-ry.

**Inside Outside Upside Down**

_Chapter 2: First impressions of Konoha High's Ice Prince_

Uzamaki Naruto.

Sophomore.

5'6".

Blonde hair blue eyes and a large smile.

Popularity stats: 0

This is how Naruto entered his school that day.

With popularity ranking lower then the sped kids and the senior Geeks who still played Yu-Gi-Oh. For one reason or another he had been pegged as the loser very early in life and had never had a real friend. In middle school this became even more of an apparent and painful fact for the young boy but never the less he tried his best to look cheerful.

He waltzed through the doors of his high school head held high, a large stupid looking grin plastered on his face.

Most people's first impression of this short blonde boy with his bright orange hoodie was that he was either "special' or absolutely insane.

Or quite possibly -and most likely- both.

But Naruto wasn't bothered by it

Well...if he was, it didn't show.

He just smiled and continued on his merry way.

Homeroom.

Naruto glanced down at his schedule and up at the door number.

7.

Seven.

He gulped a bit of fear oozing out and making his smile drop momentarily.

It had been a long time since he'd been here.

Since he'd had to face his peer.

He fidgeted closer to the door, hands curling nervously around his sleeve cuffs.

He stared numbly at the offending door.

What if the kids still hate him? What if they make fun of him again this year? What if-

"So are you going to go in or are you going to make out with the door?"

Naruto snapped out of his daze, realizing that he was just mere inches from the wood of the door. Embarrassed he backed away quickly and whipped his head back to see who had spoken.

Standing there _oh_ so apathicly was a boy. He had soft looking raven hair styled in a way that reminded Naruto vaguely of a duck's ass. His eyes were a deep coal colour and he stared emotionally back at Naruto. Stylish tight clothes fitted his slim body snuggly and DAMN…he made it look good.

"I uh…." _Man you're pretty. Are boys allowed to be pretty like that?_

The boy just continued to stare at him. Cold eyes sizing up the blonde boy

"You're still in the way." He said coolly. Eyes locking onto Naruto's.

"Oh uh…sorry…." Naruto blushed and scooted to the side allowing the raven-haired boy access to the door.

The boy looked irritated.

"Aren't you going to get it for me? You were blocking it…the least you could do is hold it open for me."

Naruto twitched. "Umm ok." He muttered and grasped the door holding it open. The boy stared at him momentarily and started for the door.

"…Do you do everything people tell to or are you just an idiot?"

Naruto growled.

"You asked me to you ass."

The boy studied him for a moment again.

"So you're an agreeable idiot then..."

Naruto choked a bit. What a bastard.

He took back all the thoughts he had about him being pretty.

He was just an asshole with birdlike hair…nice hair but an asshole all the same!!

Said raven-haired boy smirked and gracefully walked through the door leaving Naruto to fume and stomp to the back of the classroom.

He was lucky enough to snag a seat in the far back corner next to the window. At least he had that going for him.

There was a commotion going on in the front of the class. Crazy girls were screaming and squealing and it was irritating poor Naruto worse than he already was…

"Sasuke you look so great today!"

"Sasuke I love you! Lets go out tonight!"

"Sasuke! Ne, Sasuke will you sit next to me?"

"Sasuke!"

"Sasuke!"

"Kya SASUKE!!"

A vein throbbed in Naruto's forehead.

Sasuke Fucking U-Chi-Ha...that's all Naruto ever fucking heard.

He had never met the guy, due to his being in a different middle school and late transfer, but he knew that the girls _LOVED_ him. They worshiped everything about him from the ground he walked on to the toilet he shat in. All they ever did was gush about this Sasuke guy.

He was sick and tired of it, especially now that seemed to be in the same class as him…he would have to deal with this every fucking day.

_Every fucking goddamn day!_

This had to stop, it had to stop now…or he would never know true peace…

"Can you guys please save your ass kissing for later you're screams are wounding my soul…" Naruto dully yelled not looking in the direction of the girls.

Said gaggle of girls whipped around to face Naruto, all of them moving to encircle him, glaring down at the poor boy.

"What gives you the right to say that to us, huh, _Na-ru-to_?"

"Yeah!"

"You're just jealous of Sasuke because no one likes you!"

All the girls nodded in agreement.

"Oh please! How can I be jealous of some guy I've never even met? And judging on your standards he can't be all that great…"

All the girls huffed and started yelling and screaming at Naruto like no tomorrow, when suddenly that same Raven haired beauty of an asshole appeared and parted the sea of girls.

"Oh Sasuke!" One of girls innocently giggled.

Naruto's jaw dropped.

"You! You're…" he choked out slowly.

_HE_ was Sasuke.

That arrogant son of a bitch was Sasuke….

That pretty duck butted sonovabitch was **THE** Sasuke Uchiha

Naruto paled as Sasuke stared at him intensely.

'_I think I'm gonna be sick'_

A pink haired girl by the name of Haruno Sakura (the same girl that Naruto once had been somewhat friends which until she decided that being any where near him was killing her social life) pointed at Naruto and turned to Sasuke teary eyed, babbling away in a sugary sweet wounded heroine voice "Ne! Sasuke! Naruto was making fun of us!"

All the girls joined in with Sakura and Naruto just sunk further back into his seat, thinking -no- KNOWING he was utterly defeated.

"I'm s-so sor-"

"He's right you girls need to shut the hell up. Leave me **and** Him alone."

Everyone stopped dead. The whole room went silent.

Naruto's jaw dropped a second time.

All the girls looked at their beloved Sasuke with hurt eyes and walked away.

"Thank y-"

"You really _are_ an idiot aren't you?"

Sasuke bit coldly cutting Naruto off once again.

"At least I'm not some pompous asshole."

"At least I don't go around trying to make out with doors," Sasuke smirked settling himself gracefully in the seat next to Naruto.

Naruto blushed and spluttered " Bastard."

"Dobe"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT TEME!"

All the girls watched as Sasuke, THEIR Sasuke smirked quietly, as that monster Naruto yelled at him.

The blonde haired boy had no clue just what a feat it was to get Sasuke. Uchiha freaking Sasuke. The Ice prince of Konoha High to have more than a one sided conversation.

The girls didn't like this…not one bit.

**I'll be honest with you folks…I have no idea where this is going….I just know what I want the characters to be like…**


	3. Count down: It's lunchtime!

Disclaimer:

**Disclaimer**:

I'm not cool enough to own all those ninjas…

**Summery:**

Sasuke needs an attitude adjustment. Gaara is overprotective. So is Zabuza. Haku has gender issues. Ino and Sai are two peas in a pod. Lee is full of youth. Kiba is sick of just being friends. Sakura is a tad skitzo. And Poor Naruto is stuck watching it all unfold.

**Warnings:**

Boy Love. Cross-dressing. Swearing. Adult situations. Self harm.

And general life expected asshat-ry.

**Inside Outside Upside Down**

_Chapter 3:Countdown! It's Lunch Time!_

This was unnerving to say the least.

Cooked Ramen cup in hand, Naruto fidgeted back and forth between two tables.

It was lunchtime.

The mess hall was packed, and Naruto had only two foreseeable seating options placed before him.

**Option A: **The seat to his left, which was filled with pretty girls who he didn't know…and one super ice bastard Uchiha Sasuke.

**Option B:** The table to the blonde's right was completely vacant save for a boy with red hair, shocking green eyes edged in heavy black makeup and a very annoyed scary look plastered on his pale face.

Weighing these two it all seemed quite hopeless.

On one hand he got to sit with lots of pretty girls and had the off chance of possibly making some friends and/or getting a date, downside…he had to sit with Sasuke.

On the other hand, he was blissfully left alone from the taunts his peers gave him and could eat his lunch in peace on the downside that kid with the panda eye make up looked about ready to rip someone's head off.

_Girls or peace?_

_Super bastard or scary panda eyes?_

Naruto fluttered back insanely as both Mr.SuperIceBastard and Mr.ScaryPanadaEyes watched the blonde with amused, yet still very annoyed looks on their pale faces.

Suddenly someone shoved past the small boy almost making him drop his ramen cup, another person threw a wad of napkins at him and called him some random stereotype of an insult. Naruto's eyebrow twitched and as he was slowly losing all hope and trust in humanity.

The longer he stood and tried to find a place to sit the more people seemed to notice and mock his presence.

The boy's blue eyes wavered back and forth between the two tables, all together he looked quite pitiful standing there all by himself, and it was getting to be too much for the on looking boys to handle.

Just as Naruto was hit with another wad of paper and about to give up all chance of finding a decent spot to eat, a voice beckoned him.

"You. Blondie."

Naruto snapped his head up to see the scary panda boy waving a hand at him.

"Come here."

Naruto stared, panic taking hold of his body.

The panda eyed boy looked at him blankly

"I'm not going to eat you." He said flatly.

Naruto swallowed not fully sure if he believed that or not, but found himself going over to the boy despite himself.

"Ye-es Sir."

Naruto stood in front of the elder male clutching onto his ramen for dear life. The Panda boy stared up at him with a look that sent shivers up Naruto's spine and hating his legs for letting him come over here.

"Sit."

"Eh?"

"I said sit."

The boy snapped and Naruto immediately sat, staring down at his cup of Ramen. The was a long stretch of silence as the red haired male studied Naruto who- at current- was franticly writing his last will and testament in his head.

"Gaara."

"Huh?"

Naruto snapped his head back up to meet bright green eyes watching him closely.

He sighed lightly. "My name is Gaara. G A A R A." He pronounced slowly empathizing the letters as if telling it to a small retarded child.

"Oh! Naruto! My name is Naruto! N A R U T O"

He looked up at Gaara nervously, finally getting a look at the other boy close up, and he was_ beautiful_. Gaara had pale skin, and his bright green eyes were lined in black. His shocking red hair swept over the odd tattoo above his seemingly nonexistent eyebrows

'_Man, two pretty boys in one school! I didn't know people this beautiful existed!'_

"Naruto huh? After the ramen topping?"

Naruto blinked up at him and laughed nervously.

"Yeah. I figure my parents must of loved ramen to name me after one of it's toppings…then again maybe they were just being stupid. Who knows...?" He rubbed the back of his head awkwardly.

"I don't have them either"

"Huh?"

"No parents…" Gaara grunted, his eyes never leaving the Blonde.

"How did you know?"

"I can tell by the way you laughed. And your eyes…you have the same look I do."

Naruto glanced down at his ramen and then back up at the red haired boy, only to glance down at his ramen again. Hs thoughts twirled and suddenly an idea hit him.

"Say…wanna be friends?"

Gaara stared at the blonde, who was blushing but staring at him with all seriousness and determination.

"I've never had one before…"

Naruto didn't move.

"Me either. It could be a first for both of us…?"

Gaara stared and thought for a second. Drinking the smaller boy in.

"…Sure. Ok…let's"

Naruto broke out in a grin and whooped loudly throwing his arms into the air. '_A friend! A friend!!'_

"You…you're a weird kid…"

Naruto laughed finally digging into his ramen, "Yeah…I get that a lot."

Now.

I'd like you know that as our two misfits acquainted themselves with one another Mr.IcePrince himself was watching the two with shock, having fully intended to invite the amusing blonde new comer to come sit with him, before Gaara nabbed him first.

But…_**Gaara**_?

That blonde haired dobe was eating lunch with _Sabaku Gaara_!

The most feared loner in school, hell the whole CITY.

Just who the hell _WAS_ this kid?

**I'll tell you….I have no IDEA what's going on…alalala I love Gaara.**


	4. Invite Via Finger Painting

Disclaimer:

**Disclaimer**:

I'm not cool enough to own all those ninjas…

**Summery:**

Sasuke needs an attitude adjustment. Gaara is overprotective. So is Zabuza. Haku has gender issues. Ino and Sai are two peas in a pod. Lee is full of youth. Kiba is sick of just being friends. Sakura is a tad skitzo. And Poor Naruto is stuck watching it all unfold.

**Warnings:**

Boy Love. Cross-dressing. Swearing. Adult situations. Self harm.

And general life expected asshat-ry.

**Inside Outside Upside Down**

_Chapter 4:An Invite via Finger Painting _

The talk began the moment he flung, "TEME' at none other than Uchiha Sasuke but when Uzamaki Naruto sat this scrawny ass down next to Sabaku Gaara, it because a full blown uproar.

Within the day everyone in his grade knew his name.

Within a week everyone in his school knew.

Within two weeks he was infamous.

Known as the only kid brave enough -or foolish enough- to hang with Gaara and pick fights with Sasuke.

However the boy had no idea that this was all going one behind his back. Quite content with how his life was going he had no interest in what the others were whispering behind their hands.

Naruto found that he very much liked having a friend. Especially Gaara.

The two balanced each other out nicely.

Naruto was loud and talkative.

Gaara was quiet and liked to listen.

Yet they were very much alike.

Over the past few weeks they'd quickly become close and Naruto found himself telling him things that he'd never told anyone but Iruka-niisan.

Sasuke, however, was a completely different story.

Naruto consistently found himself around the raven-haired male and it was nothing but unpleasant.

Sometimes the elder boy would be nice, help him if he fell down or correct something he had wrong in a math problem, but he was such an asshole it made Naruto want to spoon out his eyes with a spork.

He'd ruin the nicest moment with a snide comment and called him 'Dobe' or "usuradonkachi' every chance he got.

The boy pissed him off to no end, but somehow he felt lonely when he wasn't around….

And so thus it brings us to Naruto's last class of the day: Art.

The only class that Gaara or Sasuke wasn't with him.

The teacher had handed him a large sheet of paper and a bin of paints, telling him to experiment.

He glanced around and wrinkled his nose lifting up a can of 'moss green' paint.

Suddenly an idea hit him and he unscrewed the can and dipped his finger into the paint.

Slowly Naruto dragged his moss green index finger across his paper.

'_AHA A FLOWER! _

The boy grinned to himself.

Happily he contained to dip his finger in the paint and doodle,

'Needs some more colour….'

Naruto dug through the colours picking out a particularly lovely shade of orange.

Just as he was about to dip his finger into the orange substance a hand shot out and grabbed his wrist, the force or it causing the small tin of orange paint to fly through the air and smack the wall with a nice profound _**'splat'**_.

Naruto's eyes widened at the vice like grip around his wrist and began to panic like and animal in a trap.

"Let go! Let me go!"

He yelled in a strangled voice, wide eyes staring at the stranger.

The arm belonged to a pale black haired male, who gave Naruto a confused frown but let go of the smaller boy's arm none the less. Naruto pulled his hands against himself and tried to calm down, the boy looked at him oddly.

"I take it you don't like to be touched?"

Naruto nodded and glanced back up at the male, He was thin and feminine with Asian eyes and a sly smile. Sitting gracefully with his legs crossed and this chin propped up by his hand, he spoke to Naruto again.

" Look, I meant no harm…I was just trying to keep you from mixing that green on your fingers with the orange, it's a waste of paint. But not that that matters now…." He said smoothly gesturing to the wall, and the orange paint oozing it's way to the floor.

Naruto frowned and groaned when he looked down at his painting.

"Ruined!"

"What were you doing?"

"Finger painting" Naruto mumbled hotly, plucking at his now flaming orange sheet of paper.

The odd boy chuckled, "I see. I'm Sai by the way. Nice to meet you."

Naruto wrinkled his nose and looked at Sai. "Naruto."

At that Sai's eyes seemed to light up.

"Uzumaki Naruto?" He questioned.

"Un. That's me."

"Interesting," He said grinning to himself when suddenly, someone yelled out and planted themself ever so gracefully onto Sai's lap.

"Ne! Ne! Saiiiiii what are you doing over-"

The girl who had sat herself atop of Sai turned to Naruto and squealed in delight.

"Aren't _you_ precious!" She grinned grabbing Naruto's face.

"Oh just look at you! Just like a little fox! Sai don't you think he looks like a little fox spirit?" He giggled turning to Sai, still holding Naruto's face.

"Indeed he does, but Ino, I do say…I think you may be scaring the little fox."

The girl Named Ino, quickly let go of Naruto's face and lent back, still smiling.

Ino had long pale blonde hair pulled back and clipped with a lily pin. She wore an apron over her tight purple shirt and jeans. Her bright blue eyes sparkled at Naruto.

'_Why is this school so full of pretty people?' _Naruto groaned to himself.

"This my dear Ino, is Uzumaki Naruto, I just saved him from the horrors that is mixing paint," He said gesturing once again to the oozing paint. Ino's eyes seemed to light up even more.

"**THE** Naruto? Sabaku's and Uchiha's Naruto? This _little_ fox?"

"So he says…." Sai grinned.

Naruto moaned again, picking up a can of blue paint and fresh piece of paper. He could hear Ino and Sai whispering to themselves, and to be honest it made him a tad nervous.

"_NARUTO UZUMAKI!!"_ Yelled Ino once again, latching her perfectly manicured hands onto the Naruto's face, with such force it not only caused the whiskered boy to scream but drop the can of blue paint he'd been battling with all over himself.

"_Aww _Ino, you scared it." Sai smiled.

Ino pouted but still did not let go of Naruto's face.

"I, Yamanaka Ino, and Sir Hino Sai, would like to invite little old you on group date!" She grinned and Naruto gulped.

"A... g-group **DATE**?"

"It's not _really_ a date, it's just a get together with some of our friends. You in Na-ru-channnn?" Ino said in a singsong voice, still holding onto Naruto's face.

The boy stared at Ino, who at current, was only a mere 3 inches from him, and he could hear Sai chuckling to himself in the background.

" You really want me to come?" Naruto asked hope filling him.

Ino finally let go of the poor boy and leaned back into Sai.

"Well of course we do. We are _very_ selective about who we bring Naruto. So you had better come! This is a rare, rare thing! Right Sai? Right?!"

Sai just laughed.

Naruto picked at his paint splatter shirt, at Sai grinning away, and at Ino nuzzling his Sai's neck.

"Where do I meet you?" Ino and Sai high fived each other.

Sai turned to Naruto.

"Meet us outside the school gate at 4. It will be a grand time we promise. Now, you better go clean yourself off, you're clashing horridly right now…."

Ino nodded in agreement, as Naruto stared down at his bright orange hoodie soaked in blue paint.

As he stood up to shuffle off to the bathroom Ino giggled and waved to him.

"Don't forget Naru-chan. If you do, well fiiiiind you!"

Naruto shuttered and as he left the room, he decided it best not to cross Ino.

**( that's all for now folks. Next chapter is part Naruto Sasuke bathroom showdown and part Ino & Sai's magical get together….what wonders are in store….lol)**


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